Recently (two days ago) I auditioned for a part in a one-act play that my school will be putting on for an Ontario-wide festival/competition thing. A few of my friends have been in it in previous years, the director is a nice teacher who taught me English last year and I thought it would be fun to try out. This is the second year I auditioned. I didn't make it last year and,
Well.
As you can probably assume, I didn't get in this year either. The callback list came out (today) and unfortunately, my name was not on it. I was so disappointed. I had been trying to tell myself not to get too excited, that I probably wouldn't get in compared to all the amazing and talented future actors and actresses, but I was still upset that I didn't make the list. In fact, I wrote a journal entry that was essentially: I GET IT I SUCK AT ACTING I HATE MYSELF I AM SO ASHAMED I'M NEVER AUDITIONING AGAIN.
I wrote that entry in a pit of sadness and embarrassment, and it was absolutely the wrong way to go about my rejection.
When you love something, you need to stick with it and not give up just because you are embarrassed that people found out you LOVE the Percy Jackson books or Doctor Who or playing tennis or whatever it is you love to do. I know I am too concerned about what other people think about my passions that I stop exploring them. I'm embarrassed to have a single Doctor Who poster in my room and have stopped wearing my Supernatural t-shirt. But I am going to change this. I think John Green said it best:
"Nerds like us are allowed to be unironically enthusiastic about stuff. Nerds are allowed to love stuff - like, jump-up-and-down-in-your-chair-can't-control-yourself love it. When people call people nerds, mostly what they're saying is "You like stuff," which is not a good insult at all. Like, "You are too enthusiastic about the miracle of human consciousness.""
*pause to appreciate this quote*
Loving something, being passionate about something IS NOT A BAD THING. Love stuff so much you burst, and don't ever, ever, ever stop because you don't want people to think you're "weird" or "sad for auditioning every year and not making it once".
That being said, I plan on auditioning again next year for Sears 2017, I will just spend this year practising.
